Back-pocket Secrets (untold_desires) wrote in euphoric_stupor,
Back-pocket Secrets

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Jeez, am I the only one who's been writing down stuff while they're high lately? LOL. But here's some more.

I had a really cool trip Saturday night while on about... oh, I'd estimate maybe 200-ish mg of DXM, 10 mg cyclobenzaprine, and 1 mg clonazepam. Plus a couple of cigarettes, but that doesn't make much of a difference.

Anyways, I was at my grandparents' house so I went outside and layed down by the lake between a couple of trees and looked up at the stars. There were all kinds of noises around me; frogs, crickets, ducks, loons. Anyways, I came back in and I was tripping out pretty good, and I just started to type what came to my mind. I remember some of the stuff I was writing at the very beginning but after that I can't remember any of it. Pretty cool, I guess. Here it is, in it's raw, unedited form:

The world is so vast… the sky engulfing it like a mother with her child in her arms. I can just feel the force of life. I just did a Beltane ritual and it was really nice… no tools, no nothing, just simply centering myself and casting the circle. I could feel the immense difference of energy within my circle. My thoughts are free but hard to control… I attempted to talk to my spirit guide but my communication with her was cloudy, I couldn’t focus in. But the feeling of the energy was amazing…. I felt such a part of the earth, of the universe, of the life-force in each and every being….. the earth beneath me felt a home that I have been searching for…. I felt caressed by my mother earth… love and peace overwhelmed me as the stars danced above me in a ballet of the meaning of life.. the moon shone with serenity, a loving watchful gaze… the moonlight is such bliss…. Excruciatingly peaceful, overwhelming almost numb yet joyous. I love my earth and the energy in it… we are all part of the life-force collectively…. We are one giant being… emotions and logical throw aside we are just a mass of amazing existence…. Love is unending, I know my goddess loves me no matter what my choices. She is a friend, a mother, a daughter, a sister, a part of me. She embraces the feminine within me, that I may be an exuberant and proud person… that I may enjoy life and all it’s pleasures, until I pass into the next world and am with her yet again in the ultimate pool of shimmering life spread throughout the world.

My lips cannot express the feelings of my heart, though love might ooze like blood from my mouth, dribbling down a massive canyon to my chest where it might churn with magick and become an essence of truth…

What is a brain, however? What is logic? Does one feel with the brain or the heart? An organ that plays an ominous tune, or a psychedelic garden blossoming with compassion..

A rampaging waterfall becomes a trickle in the stomach of a young girl who gives birth to her young child that he make suckle from her breast and in that instant give him life, let him drain a part of her life force from her so that they are connected, a bond, fluid yet unbreaking… a mother and son are tied… she brings him forth into the world from her womb in which he has been carried and nourished….. They are separated yet inseparable. He emegres from her womb and their eyes meet and they know that they bonded always….. soul to soul in this life force that flows through each and every thing.
A man with flawless features and glowing skin applies a light blue shade of lipstick to his luscious lips that have kissed so many women insincerely... glitter upon his face and his eyes shadowed an electric blue… he is painted as a doll, but he ascends the stage dignified, he plays the guitar until his fingers bleed and his blood runs over the guitar. He sweats away his inhibitions as they run down the course of his body. He simply wants to feel a man’s stubble run up against his cheek, to steal a kiss from a sticky-lipped glitter raver who’s abs run with glistening sweat as he pops his ecstasy.

Can anyone truy depend on anyone but themselves? Amigos para siempre… yet the ones who love push each other away. Is loneliness a true state, or a state of mind? Lives are lost and meaningless without someone to go through the experiences with them.

One is told to plan for the future, I say plan now. If you know what you want, do it now. The quality of life outweights the length… in an incredibly overpopulated world, why do you care if someone dies from doing drugs? I don’t honeslty care if I end up dying from doing drugs… life is short, live s much of it as you can, no matte what people say. You’re going to die eventually anway… you rather live a less successful life according to law or take some risks, probably die a little earlier, but still have had fun while you’re here on earth.

The tree was talking to me but I couldn’t respond because I don’ speak tree.

I’m really trippin.ssssssss
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